Victor Dohleman
Season 8 Kick Off
Season 8 kicks off with a profound and gut-wrenching exploration of the legal and emotional endurance required to survive Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS). We open the season with Victor Dohleman, a man whose life story reads like a high-stakes thriller, but is grounded in a father's unrelenting love for his children. Victor, a Political Science graduate who once set his sights on the CIA, found himself in a different kind of war—a 26-year battle to reunite with his three children after they were suddenly taken from their home in the early 90s.
In a candid and deeply personal conversation with Host Glass, Victor recounts the staggering roadblocks he faced, including legal "wranglings" that ascended to the California Supreme Court not once, but twice. His journey is not just one of legal persistence; it is a miracle of physical survival. Despite suffering four heart attacks and undergoing a heart transplant at Cedars-Sinai, Victor refused to let his angst turn into bitterness. Instead, he channeled his pain into activism, working with organizations that support alienated parents and combat narcissism in family law.
Victor takes us inside the grueling reality of spending nearly a quarter-million dollars on legal fees and the mental toll of depression and anxiety. Yet, he also shares the strategies that helped him survive: the power of compartmentalization, the unwavering support of his wife, Michelle, and the importance of maintaining lifelong friendships.
As a licensed psychologist and Certified Family Law Specialist, Compassionate Glass provides an expert lens as Victor offers life-saving tips for anyone currently navigating the shadows of PAS. This is more than just an interview; it is a masterclass in resilience and a beacon of hope for those who feel hopeless.
Victor Dohleman
Biography
Victor Dohleman, who graduated with a degree in Political Science from Hayward State College (now referred to as Cal State East Bay) and once fancied a career as a CIA agent (he made it to Langley), pivoted to a career as an international sales manager for a large equipment manager instead. Today, he is a successful business owner in a related field, as well as an activist for the rights of alienated parents. He talks candidly about his 26-year battle to reunite with his children. It was in the early 90’s when he married his college sweetheart and soon after, they had three children. Quickly. Right in a row. Dohelman’s kids were ages one, two, and three when suddenly one day he returned home from work only to find his wife and children gone. Once he tracked them down, he sought legal assistance to assert his rights as a father, bumping up against one legal challenge after another. When he finally began to try to work toward establishing relationships with his children, he hit more roadblocks. Dohleman’s legal wranglings ascended all the way to the California Supreme Court--twice! He’s still fighting the inequities he endured along the way. His children are now 26, 28, and 29 years old.
During the past 30 years, Dohleman has suffered major financial losses (he spent nearly a quarter million on legal fees and is still spending). He has experienced serious emotional issues (depression, anxiety, and an overall sense of hopelessness at times), and major health events such as four heart attacks, 20 years of heart failure, numerous heart procedures (16 stints, 2 heart pacemakers, 1 LVAD, etc.). Ultimately, he underwent a heart transplant at Cedar’s Sanai in Los Angeles. Eventually, Dohleman learned to compartmentalize as he continued rebuilding his life. For 20 years now, he has been married to his wife, Michelle, to whom he gives high praise for supporting him in his determination to seek justice and reunite with all three of his children. (Those relationships have had some healing, but not completely. His oldest son has never spoken or returned Dohlaman’s requests for at least a conversation.)
Though many in his position may have simply buried themselves in sorrow and resentment, Dohleman has taken his angst in another direction and put it to good use as an active participant in several organizations that assist parents who have been alienated from their child/children. He also backs groups that help divorced father’s rights, and to those who combat narcissism in family law custody battles.
In his interview with Host Glass, Dohleman recounts his tedious and exhausting journey through PAS. For the viewer, he ultimately offers tips on how to handle this Syndrome; hoping it will help others
Victor, who grew up an avid surfer and skateboarder, continues close relationships with many friends who have been in his life from childhood. He also nourishes his relationships with colleagues in the workplace and extended family members.
His story is heartbreaking to take in, but somehow comfort to those who have shared the same fate. Compassionate Glass, also a psychologist in addition to being a Certified Family Law Specialist, is an active listener throughout the interview. This is a THG Episode you may want to watch more than once. There is so much in it.