HOW TO DEAL WITH A ‘BAD’ CO-PARENT

By: David Glass

In a prior Episode with author and life coach, Darlene Taylor, who shared sage advice from her book, It’s Not About Us: A Co-parenting Guide to Taking the High Road. Glass’ blog entry listed appropriate guidelines for the “good” parent to follow as a co-parent, some of which were from Darlene’s book. In this Episode, Glass’s blog entry handles the opposite—the “bad parent.” He carefully spells out ways to deal with that person to make every attempt to keep the co-parenting civil, courteous and “professional.” Below are some mandates from Glass that he hopes parents will heed:

Here they are:

• Put your child's needs and best interests above personal conflicts.
• Keep communication brief, factual, and child focused.
• Avoid arguing about past relationship issues.
• Respond calmly instead of reacting emotionally.
• Use email, text, or a co-parenting app only. Do not use the phone.
• Stick to the parenting plan and custody agreement.
• Choose your battles and let minor issues go when possible.
• Avoid speaking negatively about the other parent in front of your child.
• Never use your child as a messenger, spy, or mediator.
• Focus on what you can control rather than trying to change the other parent.
• Learn to recognize manipulation, but don't get drawn into it.
• Consider parallel parenting if cooperative co-parenting is not possible.

Remember that consistency, patience, and stability often have a greater impact on your child than winning arguments. A useful mindset: "I don't have to win against my co-parent; I have to do what's best for my child."